Gobbledigook

This weekend I took a long walk to SjÖl, the Sea. She is especialy beautiful here. All of Iceland seems to have a dark-light contrast. It makes the shadows deep and dramatic, and the patches of light seem to protrude. The landscape here is beautiful, but very serious and raw. It seems old. Like the wrinkled face of a stern, elderly man.
Wednesday was the first real snow. Only two or three inches, but it was so beautiful.

Last week Patrick DeJohgn spoke on discipleship. One of the days he talked about surrendering everything to Christ. The whole idea of "losing your life to find it". People pretend to be very comfortable with this idea, but when you point out the less-obvious things and rights which this implies we must surrender, they begin to get defensive and make excuses why they should keep just these one or two things. I don't just mean other people, I have acted the same way, of course. "Surly Jesus wouldn't ask that of me."
My right to dream, to plan my life, to have any back-up plan whatever, to one day get married and have a family, to protect that family,to self-preservation or self-defense, to travel, to own any possessions or money, to have a job, to have a house, my right to an education or to educate others,to have any polital power or opinions or to express those opinions, to have any spiritual gifts or talents, my right to live on this Earth at all.
These are (in a nut shell) what we consider our lives to consist of, and yet we are told we cannot be a disciple of Christ and find true life when we hold on to any of these rights. And when we surrender them, we are not neccesarily promised we will get any of them back. I would go so far as to say that if you give these rights to Christ in full expectation that He will hand them right back, then you are not really surrendering them. That is not trust, that is a feeling of entitlement. And we are not entitled to anything when we are Disciples.

I have been told all my life that if I do not save up money and act responsible with what I have,and do not invest my money in insurance companies, then I am not being a good steward with my money. But this is all the wisdom of this World. Why does the Church so often forget that Jesus' Kingdom is completely upside down? The more we give away, the more Jesus promises to always provide for us in abundance. I would much rather trust in the Father that He will provide for my financial needs if I get hurt and have medical bills, then in a corrupt insurance company. Jesus certainly did not spend so much time or effort on money as we feel we must. When He needed some money, He simply caught a few fish and pulled it out of there mouths. We cannot be a Disciple of Christ if we hold our finances in our own hands.
I have also been told that in order to be successful in life, i must go to a college so that I can get a nice career. Patrick told us about so many young missionaries who, knowing the call on there lives, they decide to put it off until after they finish school so that they will have a back plan in case Godś plan does not work out. I have felt this myself, but it is rediculous to hold on to our own back up plans with the excuse of being ¨responsible¨. This is not responsible, it is a lack of trust. It is a something we feel we can fall back on in case God does not really have a plan in mind. I am by no means saying that going to school is, in any way, a bad thing. And i am not saying I will never go myself, but I do think it is necessary to be willing to not go to school, and when I know Godś plan, to not have any ¨plan B¨ of my own. And I will not go to college because of fear of losing scholarships. If God wants me at a school, will He not provide for it, scholarships or no?

These are just a few things God has been teaching me about.

Something to be praying about, if you like, is for a friend of mine called Smurfy. (I dont actually know his real name, but everyone calls him Smurfy)
Smurfy comes into Café Rót nearly everyday. He used to worship the god Thor, but recently we got to pray for him and he invited Christ into his life! One day he came into the café and told us that the reason he came in everyday is because he felt genuinely loved and cared about here.
Anyway, Smurfy is schizofrenic and is having a hard time finding a job as well. I think there is a lot of spiritual warfare in his life right now as well, which has been really overwhelming him, as he has just become a christian. So if you think of it, just be praying for him. He has a really beautiful heart.

Anyway, I love and miss you all! Bless.